


Not Always the Best Excuse for Euthanasia

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Lord Jake English, M/M, Sadstuck, dirk's pov, i gave myself feels i apologise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-27
Updated: 2013-02-27
Packaged: 2017-12-03 20:04:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/702080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His eyes open.<br/>But you are not met with emerald orbs.<br/>You are met with flashing cue balls.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Always the Best Excuse for Euthanasia

It didn't have to end like this.

One minute, you're fighting against Lord English, your three greatest friends at your side as he is skewered with tridents, punched, slashed at and rained upon with a shower of bullets. Everything is going at 100 miles per hour as the world swirls around you. Then everything just stops. You lower your blade slowly as Lord English seems to retreat, limping away as blood drips from his limbs. He practically drags himself away, and for some reason, you and your comrades show mercy, not succumbing to the low blow to kick him while he's down. It feels like you've won. 

Then you hear a scream.  
It's coming from Jake.

He drops to his knees, holding his head in his hands and he won't stop screaming, over and over again. You run to him, not caring if Lord English was to get back up. He falls to one side as his knees give out, curling up on himself and crying out, screams ripping at his throat and burning his lungs. You try to pick him up, find out what's wrong. You're shaking him, pleading him to get up and he screams and shrieks painfully and damn it, you can't do this. You can't look at him in this level of pain. But you have to. You have to support him. The two girls come running over and you look up to them. That's when you realise Lord English is gone.

That's when Jake stops screaming. 

You turn back to him, shaking his shoulders gently. He is completely limp, breathing quietly and lying on his side, curled up weakly. You murmur a soft "Jake...?" to the boy on the floor. Jane looks at you worriedly, and all you can do is look back with an equally pained expression. Roxy slaps Jake's cheek gently with her soft, pale hands. 

His eyes open.  
But you are not met with emerald orbs.  
You are met with flashing cue balls.

The cue balls look up at you, flashing in sequence. Nobody moves a muscle. No no no no no this isn't happening this CAN'T be happening... The numbers in his eyes stare behind your shades, into your amber eyes, into your soul.  
"J-Jake, are you alright?" Jane asks, bringing you out of your stupor. The boy doesn't respond, but pulls himself up, onto his knees. He doesn't make eye contact with anything but the floor. He breathes shakily, shallowly, the only movements he makes are the risings and fallings of his chest.  
"J-Jakey, baby, are you..." Roxy trails off, as Jake turns to look at her. He turns only his head to look at the girl, his eyes continuing to stare. He barely blinks, a look of horror creeping onto Roxy's face. She knows. At that, Jake tilts his head to one side slightly, and smiles at her. It is a grin that would put Lil Cal to shame, it is insane, evil. Roxy recoils slightly. Jake quickly pulls out a pistol. Blink and you'll miss it, he points the gun at Jane behind him, and fires a shot straight through her head, killing her instantly.

Roxy screams in grief and horror as Jane's body falls limply to the floor, blood spattering on the floor below her. Her scream is cut off, however, as Jake turns to the girl and fires a shot into her stomach. She makes a horrible choked noise as she hits the floor, whimpering softly. She looks up at you helplessly, before coughing and spluttering, her eyes falling shut soon after as she takes a final breath. Brought to your senses, you grab her hand and beg her to wake up, but the pale blonde girl is very much dead. You hear a click, and realise Jake's gun is out of ammunition. You look up at Jake to view his wide, cue ball eyes. A long green overcoat has appeared on him, a long strip of black winding behind his neck and down the front of the coat. It flashes in many colours so fast you worry you might contract some form of epilepsy. Your two best friends are dead, two girls who are too goddamn young to die. You know. You know that this boy was no longer Jake. This was Lord English, the cherub whose name Jake has inherited.

The Lord had stolen your best friends.  
The Lord had stolen the boy you had long since fallen in love with.

Blinded by rage, you run at the boy and floor him, pinning him to the ground. "Give him back! I said give him back you bastard!" you scream at him, and all Jake does in response is laugh heartily. Jake smiles slyly and darkly at you, breaking out into an infectious grin. "Hurt me, and the boy dies." Jake replies; even his voice is different now. It is echoed, dark, broken. You cringe painfully at how different his voice is: a sharp reminder that Jake is gone now. You slide your katana back into its holster obediently. You do not attempt to hurt Jake, but you hold him down so he is immobile. At least this way the Lord can't do anything. Ironically enough, he wrenches his right wrist out from underneath your hand so fast you barely register it, and he socks you in the side of the face. You are thrown sideways across the floor, your shades now cracked from the force of the blow. You cough gently and taste blood as you pull yourself up. You are barely standing as Jake runs at you, kicking you in the stomach. All the air disappears from your lungs as you hit the back of your head into the wall, barely standing. But you are a Strider, and Striders don't back down. 

You prepare to fight back, but the agile emerald boy is there again, blocking you into the wall and beating the blood out of your face. You try to swing back in your haze of pain and confusion, but you miss pathetically as he grabs your wrist, holding it against the wall. You are punched and hit and kicked and slammed and you want him to stop and give Jake back and goddamn this hurts so much... You inwardly apologise to your deceased brother that you are such a failure to the Strider name. Jake finally lets up, giggling evilly as you hang your head, blood dripping from your nose and the corner of your mouth, not to mention the various wounds forming in your hairline, making patches of your light blonde hair seem a deep red colour. You pant heavily, one eye open as blood runs over the other to stream down your face. Jake smiles again, and pulls off your shades. You feel horribly exposed, used to using your shades as a mask between the outside world and your emotions. You don't try and stop him though, too weak to raise your other hand to stop him. 

"And this is how it ends." Jake monologues, "How the great and powerful Dirk Strider fails to protect those close to him, how he was defeated by Lord Jake Alexander Theodore English, a-"  
"That ISN'T his name!" you interrupt, shouting at him with the rage your body will let you withstand, "That isn't his name... he's no Lord, he's a Page. He's MY Page. Now give him the hell back to me." Jake scowls at you with hate in his eyes. And then he changes. His eyes are emeralds once more. His face is contorted into an expression of pure horror and fear and pain.  
"Dirk I'm sorry I'm so sorry please end it, it hurts it hurts I-" a shaking voice cries. He looks like he's in pain, shivering and his face contorting into that expression Jane makes when she's about to cry; and then his eyes flash back to cue balls, shaking his head fiercely.  
"J-Jake...? Jake!" you try to call to him, earning you a harsh kick in the stomach, air rushing out of you once more as blood forces its way up your throat and out of your mouth, straight over your shirt. The only thing holding you up now is the way Jake has pinned you to the wall by one wrist. He chuckles softly before letting go of it.

You collapse harshly onto the floor, your back sliding down the wall as you are dropped into a messy sitting position, your arms resting weakly at your sides as he towers above you. He kneels down to you, smirking condescendingly as he places a few fingers curled underneath your chin, and pushes them up slowly, forcing you to look at him. You glare weakly at him with your amber eyes, the blood over your left eye dry and sticky, allowing you to open it slightly. "Oh, you poor soul." he tutts, mocking sympathy. He uses his other hand to push back your fringe, looking at the wounds in your head. "What a state." You look at him with disgust, trying to hide any fear you are trying to tuck away. He plucks your katana out of its holster, admiring it. You are too weak and too numb to move, all your body will let you do is watch. He looks at you one last time, before skewering you in the side with your own blade. 

You feel white hot pain explode in the right side of your diaphragm as blood gushes from the wound. You hear a pained scream that burns your throat, your daze of suffering slowly allowing you to realize it is you who is screaming. You writhe pathetically, tears pricking at your eyes as you arch your back painfully. After what feels like hours of squirming in pain, you fall limp, agony transforming into a numbness that slowly starts spreading through your bloodstream. Jake pulls out your bloody katana, forcing a pained whimper to bubble up out of your voice box. The blood is now allowed to run more freely, making you feel weaker still. You manage to move a limp hand to clutch at the wound, a desperate attempt to keep the blood in. Jake drops your katana, the clatter bringing you out of your haze. You glance down at your blade, and realise. 

There's only one way you can end his suffering.

You pick up your katana, not giving it a second thought.  
"Sorry Jake..." you breathe, before ramming the katana through Jake's chest. He screams painfully, and it's his voice, his thick accent of English and Australian all at once. It hurts you even to hear it. His coat dissipates into thin air and his eyes return to their normal foresty emerald green, albeit tired and less vivid. "Dirk..." he forces out, before collapsing in front of you. It's over, you think, it's over for both of us. You pick up his barely conscious body, forcing yourself to stand. You stagger over to the bodies of Roxy and Jane, blood dripping from your wound and Jake's. You place his bleeding body gently on the floor, katana still protruding from his chest. You huddle Roxy and Jane closely, clasping their hands together. They are no longer separated. You place Jake to the right of them, before you collapse at their left, blood mixing with the blood of your friends. 

"D-Dirk...?" Jake whispers.  
"Shh, it's alright, we're okay now." you soothe him, reaching out over Roxy and Jane to place a bloodied hand on his cheek, the blood mixing with his tears.  
"I'm sorry." Jake apologises, crying softly.  
"I'm sorry, too." you reply. You shiver gently, noticing the hand he'd placed over Jane. You take your hand away from his cheek, moving it down to hold his hand supportively.  
"Dirk... I'm scared." Jake whispers, shivering as his body tries to force blood back into him. You're a little bit scared too, but you don't dare let it show, for Jake's sake.  
"Don't be, your friends are here. We're all together now." you smile softly, a tear escaping your eye and dripping off your nose. Jake's shivering is also due to the amount of pain he's in; a katana in your chest isn't exactly comfortable. 

Oh the irony, you think. 

"Please Dirk... this hurts... hurts so much..." Jake whimpers. You reach over, and yank the blade from his chest, returning it to your holster. Instead of crying in pain, he sighs in relief as the blood flows freely from his chest. You think you hear him breathe a quiet "Thank you..." but you're not sure. Suddenly, the edges of the world begin to fade into black, and Jake looks weak. You know your time left alive is limited.  
"Jake... listen to me." you address. He looks at you tiredly, his eyes dull and half closed. "I-" You are interrupted as a volley of blood makes its way out of your mouth, metallic taste making you gag as you cough weakly. Jake watches helplessly, but you stroke circles on his hand with your thumb, telling him it's okay. "I... I love you." you breathe weakly.  
"I love you too mate." he responds instantly, and he grins. It's weak, but it's there. The same innocent, enthusiastic grin you fell in love with. You begin to fade out, your vision making you see double.  
"I'll miss you..." Jake sighed softly.  
"I'll miss you too." you reply, smiling sombrely. Jake goes quiet, taking a few short breaths before his eyes close slowly, and Jake finally slips away. You don't get time to be sad, because before you know it, the world is fading out and going black. The last thing you register seeing is Jake's calm, sleeping face, void of pain or suffering, before you lose consciousness and feel your breath finally stop. 

You die surrounded by your four greatest friends.

A few hours later, a robotic figure zips through the sky. Her emotionless eyes look over the landscape, over the shell of what once was the green planet, home of the Felt. She notices something amiss, and stops. A completely intact building? She glides down to the building, stepping inside. She searches the place carefully, looking through every room, until finding one very important one. In this room, the lighting is fairly dim, her metal skin barely shining. The blue V shape on her chest shines the brightest, as it is the cleanest metal on her. Her red eyes glow brightly, illuminating the tips of her curly hair and rounded, ram like horns. As she walks in, she notices four bodies, all huddled together. The blood doesn't faze her anymore, it's just a job she is given. However, she avoids it, keeping her dress somewhat clean. The four teens are clearly long dead, judging by the temperature of their limp corpses. She knows, she knows what the death of these children means. She nods to herself. She leaves the building, the planet, the system, the universe. She locks it away, and destroys it as quickly as she can. She thinks of the billions of organisms she has just murdered, and feels only an artificial spark of remorse as she flies away. Just another doomed timeline, Aradiabot said to herself.

Just another doomed timeline...


End file.
